On How to Say No (Gracefully)

This Week’s Topic: Saying No

1 Strategy 🎯 

Some requests are easy to say “no” to.

Wanna eat this bug? 🪲 

No.

Wanna rob a bank?💰

No thanks.

Wanna visit the Titanic in my homemade submersible?

Absolutely not.

There are other scenarios where saying ‘no’ can have real negative consequences for you, your career, and the people you care about.

The inspiration for this week’s email came from a conversation with a client earlier this week. They’ve just been offered a promotion and, for a variety of personal and professional reasons, they’ve decided to turn down the opportunity.

This presented a challenge.

They want to honor their decision to say ‘no’ to the opportunity, without coming across as unambitious, unappreciative, or not a team player.

The conversation brought to mind a podcast episode I heard several months ago that had a big influence on how I say no.

The gist of the podcast was that the host was asking high profile entrepreneurs to contribute to a book he was writing about high-performance leadership and culture.

While many people turned down his request, some rejections were more graceful than others.

And a few rejections were so expertly crafted that he actually gained more respect for the person.

Here’s an example:

“Greetings and thanks for writing. I’m grateful for the invitation to participate in your book project, but I’m struggling at this moment to make time for all we’ve got going on with the business, including my ongoing procrastination with my own writing projects. I thought carefully about this, and it’s clearly a wonderful opportunity, but I’m going to decline with gratitude. Know the book will be a big success! Thanks again. - Danny”

While it wasn’t the original intent of the invitations, the rejections he received highlighted a reliable and repeatable formula for saying ‘no’ elegantly. Here are the ingredients:

• Express gratitude 🙏

• Acknowledge the value of the opportunity 💎

• Say that you thought carefully about it 🤔

• Articulate your primary reason for saying ‘no’ (over-committed, competing priorities, personal policy, etc.) 🚫

Whether you need to turn down an opportunity in writing or face-to-face, this same formula applies.

And while we can’t control how others will respond - they might still have a negative reaction - we can control how we deliver the message.

Mastering the art of saying 'no' gracefully is not just about protecting your time and boundaries; it's also about maintaining relationships and demonstrating integrity.

By expressing gratitude, acknowledging the value of the opportunity, and providing a thoughtful rationale for the decision, you can navigate even the most delicate refusals with confidence and respect.

Did this week’s topic resonate with you? Hit ‘reply’ and let me know!

See you next Wednesday,

Darin 

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